As promised, the return of the Oxygen Destroyers!

Part 1

It was 2008. Rock and roll was officially declared dead. Communism was on the rise. Unemployment was at an all time high. The man was in full force, selling albums at the outrageous price of $25.63. Even noble causes like iTunes were co-opted, and mp3s became punishable by death. The world was in a dark tunnel and there seemed to be no light at the end.

That's where the world was wrong.

Eight weeks after the untimely death of all the members of the famed rock group, the Oxygen Destroyers, several punk teenagers hopped the fence into Holy Carmel cemetery and made there way to the rock group's grave. When alive, the Oxygen Destroyers had been supporters of the drug Derbisol, and it had become a ritual to local music fans to “spray up" while standing atop their plots. On this fateful night, a storm was brewing.

Upon reaching the tomb, the teenagers scrabbled atop the sarcophagus and took out their cans of Derb. As the fates would have it (oh, those crazy fates!), just as the Derbisol was exposed, the tomb was struck by lightning. The electricity charged the Derbisol, which, in some unexplained scientific phenomenon, somehow transferred the life of the teens into the world's most popular rock group. That's right, the Oxygen Destroyers were alive.

When asked about the other side, bassist Marty Sweeney is quick to comment.

"It sucked. So, I died, what, like three days before the rest of the group, right? And first off, those asses don't even notice, but who cares. Anyway, there is this clause in our contract that says I can't go into the afterlife without the rest of the band. So I die and I end up on the banks of the River Styx. Where I have to stay for three days. No people, no TV, no music, just me and the creepy boatman. And all that guy did was play tiddlywinks. It was so annoying. If I had to spend one more day there, I would have killed him. I swear to God.

"So then, finally, after the three most excruciatingly painful days of my life, the rest of the band kicks the bucket. And so we finally pay the boatman and board the boat, and I'm freaking out. I don't think I've ever been so happy. So we start crossing the river, right? And what happens? That jackass Brian shoves me out of the boat! And doesn't even say anything! So, of course, the band doesn't notice, you know, I'm only the bassist. Now, the thing you gotta understand is that the river Styx isn't made of water. It's this really thick soul residue, like pudding. It's really freaking hard to get out of.

"So, I'm stuck in the ‘water,' and I'm yelling for help, but no one hears me. Not even that jackass boatman. I tell you, when I die again, that guy is getting a fist/brick sandwich. Point of this story is that I never got to see the afterlife. I spent the 8 weeks we were dead stuck in the river Styx."

Brian Hurley's thoughts on the subject:

"Oh, man, the afterlife kicks ass. I got to rock out with Elvis and ? at the same time! How crazy is that? What? No, no, no. I did not push Marty into the River Styx! He's just really bitter that he fell in and missed rock heaven! No, no, I'm not going to take this. This interview is over! Over!"

Now the members of the ODs were living again, but would they play music? The answer of course, was yes. "Oh, yeah, Heaven totally gave us a new outlook on music. We decided to get back together for the sake of rock and roll, not to make money or score chicks, just to rock. So the minute we had life in our bodies the Oxygen Destroyers were together again. Except for Sweeney. We had to ‘convince' him."

With a new mission to rock, the Oxygen Destroyers regrouped with the original line up, Maciej on vocals and guitar, Katie on lead guitar, Marty on bass, and Joe on drums. Kevin "the Beatmixer" Altier and Brian, the third guitarist, were immediately given their walking papers. They would go on to semi-stardom, along with Kiefer Madness drummer Nic White in the folk-rock band, Irish Sports Page.

Now that the lineup was set, the next item on the ODs' agenda was recording. They went into the studio with famed rock producer Bruce Dickinson and almost immediately walked right out.

"The guy was a toy factory to the nth degree," says Katie. "He kept trying to get us to use the damned cow bell. You know, Bruce, sometimes a cowbell just doesn't work. You got a fever? Yeah, I got one too, and its only prescription is kicking your ass!"

It was clear to the ODs at this point that things between them and JIVE! Records just weren't working out. They quickly broke their contract and headed back to their first home, D or N records.
"D or N wasn't interested in the glam, the glitz, or the gore," says Joe. "They wanted us to rock, and we were more than willing to grant their wish. They let us make the record we wanted to make."

The ODs decided to self-produce their first post-mortem full length, Return from the Grave, and recording began immediately. The sessions lasted less than a week, with the band rocking through several tracks a night. With the record recorded, the artwork was finished and the album was put out, and the Oxygen Destroyers headed out on tour.